1:51 p.m. - 2007-05-30
J'en perds la raison dans la mer du Japon
Pfft. That is the sound that I make when I blow air through my lips which aren't exactly closed but not open either, btw. I'm having a really really bad hairday, we have the last "practical geodesy" thing today :( and I feel funny/weird.
Don't know if I should go to the hairdresser's before going lingerie shopping and the last geodesy thing. Though I also don't know any reasons why NOT to go, since my hair really looks like shite. This morning, while standing in front of the mirror, I actually thought to myself how on earth can anyone make my hair look good ever again. A true mission impossible.
Oh yeah, and I found out that my brother isn't moving out in June but in July.
Le sigh.
On a more happier note, I found the world's greatest webcomic a couple of days ago. It's called Girls with Slingshots and I'm actually a bit sad now that I've read all the strips that have been published so far. What will happen next?? Well, at least I've got something to wait for.
I need a slingshot myself, really.
8:08 p.m. - 2007-05-29
Mm-m
Oon jotenkin kamalan v�synyt eik� oo kauhea n�lk�. V�lill� oon ihan hirve�n iloinen jostain (esim. laihtumisesta), mutta sitten kun vilkaisen kalenteria ja n�en tenttej� t�yteen tupatut viikot, muistan ett� helvetti, mullahan on tulossa mukava kes�kuu.
Oon menossa huomenna alusvaateostoksille, kaiken j�rjen mukaan sen pit�is olla ihan pirist�v��. Eilenkin k�vin ostamassa uuden huulikiillon, kuorinta-aineen kasvoille, d�d�n/antiperspirantin ilman aluminium chloride -nimist� myrkyllist� ainetta, proteiinipommihiustenhoitoaineen ja ja.. sellasta pient� kivaa. En oo tuhlannut t�ss� kuussa viel� yht��n, joten en oo ylitt�nyt (viel�) budjettia.
Meill� on nyt ollut geodesiasta k�yt�nn�n harjoituksia eilen ja t�n��n (tosin molemmilla kerroilla ne keskeytyi sateen takia), ja mun ryhm�ss� on yks tosi s�p� tyyppi, ja sill� on aivan ihana hymy. Aika ironista ett� tajusin vasta vikalla geodesian luennolla ett� se istuu melkein mun vieress�! Argh, miks pit�� olla n�in hidas aina?? Se ei edes opiskele maisema-arkkitehtuuria eli en n�e sit� samalla luennolla luultavasti en�� ikin�.
12:07 p.m. - 2007-05-28
More caffeine, please
It's so hot, so hot. Phew. When I tried my bikini on yesterday, I remembered that the other "triangle's" seam has started to come apart slightly. I never had time to get it fixed it last year and then I just forgot about it, and now I don't have anybody who could sew it for me. Yes, I can sew but under no circumstances, I do NOT want to wear anything that I have sewn because it looks like shit. But I'll fix the bikini top somehow, I don't want to buy new ones because it was pure hell trying find those last summer, and they actually look pretty ok on me. And anyway, you won't see the seam thing unless you're really close, so. It's not so urgent.
I always try to eat more healthy in the summer (vegetables, water, coffee and an occasional dose of diet coke), it's a bit easier now that it's so hot that I don't actually crave for anything sweet or unhealthy. I'm encouraged by the fact that I can't keep my Zara jeans high enough. Sure, it's a bit annoying to walk when they slip down all the time, but boy does it feel good to think that they were actually a bit tight last winter! I can actually take them off without opening the button and the zipper! Yeah, very very useful.
My sisters are coming here on next week's Friday! Okay, I've got a mid-term exam on next week's Friday too, but who cares. I feel like I'm on top of the world, like I could do anything, even pass a mid-term exam or two - if I study hard enough.
6:51 p.m. - 2007-05-26
I fear failure
I've been feeling a bit PMS-y (is that a word?) for the past few days which is a bit weird because my hormones are then badly late. I've been really emotional, I even started sobbing when I saw this documentary about the differences of men and women and why women end up cheating on men, and why women are attracted to different kinds of men depending on whether they're menstruating or not. I was a bit confused after that one, it was so weird.
Maybe it's because I realized that the exams are drawing nearer and nearer, and that I really have to pass at least 5 exams now in June, which is quite a lot for me. I don't like the Bologna process because it makes my situation extremely tricky. I can try to pass my exams only 3 times and if I don't manage to do that, then I'll have to do the courses again. You know, all the subjects are worth a certain amount of points, and if I want to enroll the second year next autumn, I have to get at least 37 points out of 60. In the first semester I passed only descriptive geometry (8 points), drawing (4 points) and English (4 points). Impressive, isn't it? Anyway, in the second semester I will definitely pass English again (4 points again, since English lasts 2 semesters) and painting (4 points). So, all in all I will have 24 points which means that I'll have to gather 13 points more to enroll the second year. Doesn't sound like much, does it? For me it's the same as climbing Mt. Everest, which means that it's not impossible but very very difficult and I might lose a limb or two trying it. Sigh.
The rest of this semesters subjects are botanics (7 points), pedology (7 points), geodesy (4 points) and nature preservation (4 points) and I'm going to try all of them in June, but I doubt I'm going to pass all of them. For that I'd need a divine intervention or something! Maybe I can pass two, or in an extremely good case three, but.. You know, some days I'm just so afraid that I won't be able to do it. Everyone tells me that I can do it, including E, M (he called last night) and my middle brother, and it's kinda scary because what if I don't succeed? M said that if an ass like my youngest brother was able to do it back in the days, then so the hell can I. That made me feel better.
It was a bit weird talking with my middle brother in MSN because I've never done it before, we're not that close. But he's the nicest one of the three of them, he hardly ever gets mad at me and I can count the times when he's called me an idiot with one hand, so I really appreciate it that he told me those encouraging things last night. I hear he's doing pretty well too, he might graduate next year and now he's working in some construction firm as some kind of a boss, which is great news. If someone deserves a great job like that, then it's my brother.
We used to have so much fun, we were so much closer. Why can't we stay kids forever?
4:30 p.m. - 2007-05-25
Nature extravaganza
Today was the day when we went to collect those dumb plants from Kosutnjak. I will never ever again want to go there again, unless we're walking on real roads, NOT in mud and high grass and stuff that smells so.. so much like.. forests. In a bad way. There were so many huge spiders and bugs and some guy even claimed to see some sort of an animal behind some trees, and if I had had to stay there any longer, I swear I would've started crying and ditched all my plants in a puddle of brown mud. And that would've been kinda bad. I felt horror when all those plants and bugs were invading my space, I thought I could be killed by a gigantic poisonous spider or they'd climb up my leg or something. It didn't help that I was wearing a skirt, a shirt with a low cleavage and ballerina pumps. Yeah, I sort of forgot about the plant trip.. So my luck.
Yeah, I'm so not an outdoors person.
10:23 a.m. - 2007-05-23
You're giving me the chills
Yesterday I finally managed to get my supergold membership, so the comments are up and running. I also learned new stuff about html and everything, which almost drove me crazy and definitely gave me a headache.
Yesterday's geodesy mid-term exam went okay, I think. I managed to do 2,5 exercises out of 4 which is just what I expected. Even if we were allowed to use our books, it wasn't easy because if you don't understand the exercises, then it doesn't matter if you have 10 books next to you or none. The first exercise was pretty easy because all we had to do was change these normal degrees into radians and.. what's this other thing called, something like gradus? Whatever. I had never done that before but managed to find the instructions in the book. I was there when we were supposed to do it in the beginning of the semester but I was probably half asleep. In high school I wasn't there when we were supposed to do it, if we were ever even supposed to learn that in high school. I was probably shopping with Heidi and laughing at the maths teachers who gave us only 2 "minuses" when we had skipped like 8 lessons. Oh, those high school times..
Yesterday during the geodesy seminar I travelled back in time, when my mp3 player randomly played this one song I haven't heard in ages, Apulanta's Ilona. It was like in 1997 all over again - me, Iiris and Vilja in the music classroom in YNK with the music teacher who was showing us the new song books the school had ordered. He was okay, even if he used to get these weird fits when he got mad at the kids. Back then graduating from high school didn't feel real. Me and Nina used to talk how it's stupid to study 10 more years before we graduate, it felt like an eternity then. I sometimes miss the simplicity of being a kid.
Re-opening my account at imood.com brought another blast from the past. I was actually trying to create a new account when it told me that there already is an account for my email address, so I asked the site to sent the username and password to my address. I got the chills when I saw the username, Mehis. I haven't heard that nickname in a long time! The last time I used the account was in February 2004, 3 effing years ago. Where did time go?
10:44 a.m. - 2007-05-22
Curiosity killed the cat but it doesn't seem to harm us
My brother managed to be nice to me for about two weeks, but maybe it's because we usually talk to each other quite little, like max. 4 sentences a day.
"What's Buli done today"
"Slept, what else."
"Is there anything to eat?"
"Yep, check the fridge."
"Shouldn't you be studying for your exams instead of being on msn?"
"Yep."
That's pretty much everything we talk about. Impressive, isn't it? Nowadays when he starts complaining and bitching about stuff, I just don't answer because if I did, I'd do it in such an annoying way that it'd tick him off even more than my silence. I don't like fighting and it's just easier to shut up and ignore him, pretend that I don't care. I don't know why, but last night I wanted to be nice to him so I told him that he should probably turn off the "save my chat logs" function in MSN Plus! Live because he probably doesn't want to save them. The poor boy didn't even realize that he and his Finnish girlfriend's (who whe has kept as a secret) conversation was saved in a place where everyone can see it, including me. Should I feel bad?
10:08 a.m. - 2007-05-21
Totally frozen
Woah, I passed the pedology test! The assistant asked every one of us questions, and I was second in row so I didn't have that much time to revise before she started bombing me with those horrible questions, like "how do people change the structure of the ground layers" or something. Phew, I kinda froze but managed to say something that wasn't all wrong. The last questions were a bit, umm.. I didn't know what to say because I was so nervous and I just didn't find the Serbian words, so the assistant let me write them on paper (I write Serbian much better than speak it). Maybe she felt sorry for me. But I passed! She actually said that she doesn't want to torture me any longer. Haha, and I thought she didn't like me.
Tomorrow's geodesy mid-term exam makes me a bit nervous, even if only need to get 1 point out of 15, so that they see I've taken the test, but it'd be sorta nice to get more points because all in all, I need 60 points to pass the whole subject (seminar attendance + mid-term exam + exercises that we've done = 50 points, exam = 50 points). You'd think that it was easy but I tell you, for a lazy person like me it's not.
Damn you Bologna process!
5:53 p.m. - 2007-05-20
Oh the drama
I wish I was in Finland! Marina told me in MSN that our middle brother (and after him, mum and our oldest brother too) found out about that Bosnian guy! The guy has a girlfriend but the girlfriend cheated on him and thought she was pregnant, but she wasn't, and now the guy doesn't know what to do (to leave her or not) and all my sister hopes is that he leaves the girl for good ("because she's an ugly bat"). The middle brother made Marina tell him if the guy really had a girlfriend because if she didn't say it, he could just go and ask him, and in my brother's language that means "I'll go and strangle him a bit and teach him a lesson of having two girls at the same time and then ask him". Now mum is disappointed because she feels that she can't be trusted since Marina said that she feels uncomfortable when talking about the guy, and mum heard about him yesterday for the first time. Well, no wonder Marina felt uncomfortable when the (almost) whole family was there listening! (Tinkku was eavesdropping in the stairs.) The oldest brother was just laughing and commenting on the story in his own way, so he really doesn't take it seriously. The day the guy started flirting with Marina, I told her that she should stay away from him, because she heard from a friend that he's been bragging in school how "this girl (my sister) is so falling for him" and how fun it is and blah blah blah. I know girls are blind when it comes to guys and it's easy to say all this since I don't have any feelings for the Bosnian boy and I'm not the one being an ass, but STILL - how can she be so blind? The guy is clearly a jerk who deserves to be dumped by the cheating girlfriend. I've tried telling this to my sister but she just doesn't get it, and I don't want to make her mad so that she won't tell me the newest stuff about the guy anymore. Complicated.
